Miss Ablanedo Morales to …. Mrs. Ablanedo Morales

This year, I became a married woman. Naturally, a lot of things have changed since then, but my last name has not been one of them. Although changing, or not changing, one’s name, is entirely a personal choice, I decided that not changing my last name was best for me.

When Yuki and I married, we made several promises. We promised that we would make decisions together, share our joys and our sorrows, face challenges and hardships together, and become a family together. From the moment we said “I do”, our lives became entwined in more ways than one. My family became his family and his family became my family. I didn’t believe that changing my last name would contribute to further unite us as a family. Furthermore, I didn’t consider changing my name to be a way to legitimize my marriage. I’m sure, or at least I would hope, that others don’t come to the conclusion that because I don’t share a last name with my husband, our marriage isn’t real!

For as long as I can remember, literally, I have been Patricia Ablanedo Morales. The more I thought about possibly becoming “Patricia Morioka”, the more foreign the idea seemed. My last name, just like my first name, has become a part of my identity. Just like I wouldn’t change my first name because I married, I eventually realized that to me, it didn’t make sense to change my last name, and my identity, either.

I have to admit here, that Mexican tradition and my family played a role in my decision. In Mexico, every person has two last names. The first last name is the father’s first last name, and the second last name is the mother’s first last name. In my case, for example, Ablanedo is my father’s name and Morales is my mother’s name. Women (and men) keep their last names upon marriage and when a child is born to a couple, the child gets to have a part of each parent’s last name. As a Mexican woman, I wanted to continue that tradition. However, my decision was influenced by the fact that I am absolutely a family girl. My closeness to and my respect for the family who raised me and loved me from the beginning further convinced me to keep my last name.

Lastly, had I changed my last name, I would have had to change my name on both passports, driver’s licenses, bank accounts, and countless other places. That, alone, should have been enough to convince me to keep my name from the beginning!

All photography in this post by Edward Louis Photography